Post by khaine on Apr 17, 2007 21:31:37 GMT -5
Known as "Thief and the Cobbler: Recobbled Cut," this was the uncut version of the animated film released by Mirimax that for a variety of reasons was trimmed down (perhaps due to the insane violence and to make it more family friendly).
Here is the cut down version:
www.amazon.com/Thief-Cobbler-Jennifer-Beals/dp/B0006Q93L0/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2/002-3168581-2224841?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1176861175&sr=8-2
The Recobbled Cut, however, is extremely difficult to find. Fortunately I have a copy (and it can be viewed on Google Video or Youtube at a much lower copy), and counting this was extremely easy, because animator Richard Williams would literally have his victims lined out in perfect square and rectangle formations. The death and destruction was meticulously crafted and done on a scale that rivals even Lord of the Rings.
This is probably the new #1, which is strange considering that the theatrically released version is rated G. And the deaths are some of the most bizarre (yet beautiful) ever animated or filmed.
Now for the count:
Thief and the Cobbler: Recobbled Cut
Visual, onscreen deaths: 998
Implied deaths: tens of thousands
Keep in mind that this was a very conservative estimate. I only counted those people who were shown to have been killed onscreen, and any up in the air guesses or impending deaths were not counted. A liberal estimate of the film's body count would be substantially higher.
Midway into the film, a messenger with many arrows impaled in his back brings the news of an impending One-Eye invasion to King Nod, then dies - 1.
Prior to his arrival, the King of the One-Eyes stands atop a pile of hundreds of corpses, proclaiming his victory in battle; the arrow-riddled messenger the only survivor. None of the dead bodies are counted, even though some of their faces can be seen.
WAR MACHINE SEQUENCE: This is where the vast majority of on screen deaths occur:
One-Eye footsoldiers crushed by a giant rock: 11 (liberal estimate is 13 but is not counted).
One-Eye footsoldiers systematically killed by arrows: 32 (another 32 were in line to be shot but the camera cut away, so the other 32 are not counted).
One-Eye footsoldiers inundated with boiling magma: 147 (had the camera followed the path of boiling magma, another 100+ One-Eye footsoldiers would have been killed, but they are not counted either).
One-Eye footsoldiers crushed to death by a giant, spikey ball: 50 (Richard Williams had them lined up 5x10 and every last one of them were shown to be utterly crushed).
One-Eye footsoldiers bowled to death by firey, spikey balls into an inferno: 54 (based on the formations, it is implied that 60 died, but we only see 54).
One-Eye footsoldiers fall to a fiery death after their platform is hit by a giant teapot-launched heated screw: 40.
One-Eye footsoldiers dragged to death by fiery scissors: 2.
One-Eye footsoldiers fall into a can after a spikey ball, triggered by the hot scissors, knocks over their platform. The can is then impaled by another spikey ball. Out of the 32 that fell in, only five survive, bringing the total dead to: 27.
One-Eye footsoldiers pursue the Thief, only to be obliterated by a giant spiky wrecking ball: 8.
One-Eye footsoldiers, fleeing the fiery hell that has consumed their war machine, are scooped up by a flaming giant lobster claw and later crushed by another giant spikey ball. Out of the 54 fleeing, only 28 survive: 26.
One-Eye footsoldiers, in 12x8 formation, are systematically slid off of their platform into a fiery death: 96.
One-Eye footsoldiers, in 5x6 formation, are sweeped off of their platform into a fiery death: 30.
Here's the real whammy - a 20x20 formation of One-Eye footsoldiers are crushed by a giant flyswatter. A single One-Eye footsoldier falls into the contraption to trigger it, which obliterates his body: 401.
One-Eye footsoldiers are crushed by a giant wall after it is hit with a salvo of giant spikes: 10 (a liberal estimate would put the number at at least 16, but we only see 10 getting crushed).
Fifteen of the One-Eye footsoldiers were on top of the spiked wall that fell, all of them utterly wrecked after the collapse: 15.
One-Eye soldiers, standing in line, are literally ironed to death by a giant iron: 36 (we only see 36 die but if the camera had followed the iron further the number could have been as high as 50, considering that the line went on indefinitely).
Ten One-Eye footsoldiers are launched into the air, and are impaled on each other's spears: 10
The King of the One-Eyes is killed by his own harem: 1.
Zig-Zag the evil Grand Vizier is eaten alive by crocodiles and later his own pet vulture: 1.
Here is the cut down version:
www.amazon.com/Thief-Cobbler-Jennifer-Beals/dp/B0006Q93L0/ref=pd_bbs_sr_2/002-3168581-2224841?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1176861175&sr=8-2
The Recobbled Cut, however, is extremely difficult to find. Fortunately I have a copy (and it can be viewed on Google Video or Youtube at a much lower copy), and counting this was extremely easy, because animator Richard Williams would literally have his victims lined out in perfect square and rectangle formations. The death and destruction was meticulously crafted and done on a scale that rivals even Lord of the Rings.
This is probably the new #1, which is strange considering that the theatrically released version is rated G. And the deaths are some of the most bizarre (yet beautiful) ever animated or filmed.
Now for the count:
Thief and the Cobbler: Recobbled Cut
Visual, onscreen deaths: 998
Implied deaths: tens of thousands
Keep in mind that this was a very conservative estimate. I only counted those people who were shown to have been killed onscreen, and any up in the air guesses or impending deaths were not counted. A liberal estimate of the film's body count would be substantially higher.
Midway into the film, a messenger with many arrows impaled in his back brings the news of an impending One-Eye invasion to King Nod, then dies - 1.
Prior to his arrival, the King of the One-Eyes stands atop a pile of hundreds of corpses, proclaiming his victory in battle; the arrow-riddled messenger the only survivor. None of the dead bodies are counted, even though some of their faces can be seen.
WAR MACHINE SEQUENCE: This is where the vast majority of on screen deaths occur:
One-Eye footsoldiers crushed by a giant rock: 11 (liberal estimate is 13 but is not counted).
One-Eye footsoldiers systematically killed by arrows: 32 (another 32 were in line to be shot but the camera cut away, so the other 32 are not counted).
One-Eye footsoldiers inundated with boiling magma: 147 (had the camera followed the path of boiling magma, another 100+ One-Eye footsoldiers would have been killed, but they are not counted either).
One-Eye footsoldiers crushed to death by a giant, spikey ball: 50 (Richard Williams had them lined up 5x10 and every last one of them were shown to be utterly crushed).
One-Eye footsoldiers bowled to death by firey, spikey balls into an inferno: 54 (based on the formations, it is implied that 60 died, but we only see 54).
One-Eye footsoldiers fall to a fiery death after their platform is hit by a giant teapot-launched heated screw: 40.
One-Eye footsoldiers dragged to death by fiery scissors: 2.
One-Eye footsoldiers fall into a can after a spikey ball, triggered by the hot scissors, knocks over their platform. The can is then impaled by another spikey ball. Out of the 32 that fell in, only five survive, bringing the total dead to: 27.
One-Eye footsoldiers pursue the Thief, only to be obliterated by a giant spiky wrecking ball: 8.
One-Eye footsoldiers, fleeing the fiery hell that has consumed their war machine, are scooped up by a flaming giant lobster claw and later crushed by another giant spikey ball. Out of the 54 fleeing, only 28 survive: 26.
One-Eye footsoldiers, in 12x8 formation, are systematically slid off of their platform into a fiery death: 96.
One-Eye footsoldiers, in 5x6 formation, are sweeped off of their platform into a fiery death: 30.
Here's the real whammy - a 20x20 formation of One-Eye footsoldiers are crushed by a giant flyswatter. A single One-Eye footsoldier falls into the contraption to trigger it, which obliterates his body: 401.
One-Eye footsoldiers are crushed by a giant wall after it is hit with a salvo of giant spikes: 10 (a liberal estimate would put the number at at least 16, but we only see 10 getting crushed).
Fifteen of the One-Eye footsoldiers were on top of the spiked wall that fell, all of them utterly wrecked after the collapse: 15.
One-Eye soldiers, standing in line, are literally ironed to death by a giant iron: 36 (we only see 36 die but if the camera had followed the iron further the number could have been as high as 50, considering that the line went on indefinitely).
Ten One-Eye footsoldiers are launched into the air, and are impaled on each other's spears: 10
The King of the One-Eyes is killed by his own harem: 1.
Zig-Zag the evil Grand Vizier is eaten alive by crocodiles and later his own pet vulture: 1.
)